50+ Funny Dad Jokes
That’ll Crack You Up!

Looking for a laugh? You’ve come to the right place!
These funny dad jokes are the perfect mix of silly, smart, and
just plain ridiculous. Whether you’re a dad, know a dad, or just
love that classic “groan-worthy” humor, These Funny Dad Jokes
will have you and your family giggling all day.

  1. Why did the vacuum apply for a raise?
    Because it was tired of getting pushed around!
  2. What do you call a factory that makes good jokes?
    A satisfactory.
  3. Why did the coffee file a police report?
    It got mugged.
  4. Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long?
    Because then it would be a foot!
  5. What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie?
    Sofishticated.
  6. Why did the egg hide?
    Because it was a little chicken!
  7. Why don’t scientists trust stairs?
    Because they’re always up to something.
  8. What does a lemon say when it answers the phone?
    Yellow!
  9. Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of pants?
    In case he got a hole in one.
  10. Why don’t skeletons ever go on vacation?
    Because they don’t have the guts.
  11. What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet?
    Supplies!
  12. Why was the math book sad?
    It had too many problems.
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More Funny Dad Jokes You’ll Love

Cartoon dad smiling with the joke: That was time-consuming, after eating a clock, surrounded by colorful emojis on a red background.
  1. What did the dad say when the TV broke?
    Looks like we’ve got a screen play!
  2. Why did the banana go to the doctor?
    Because it wasn’t peeling well.
  3. Why was the broom late?
    It swept in.
  4. What kind of shoes do ninjas wear?
    Sneakers.
  5. Why did the tomato turn red?
    Because it saw the salad dressing.
  6. What do you call fake spaghetti?
    An impasta.
  7. How does a penguin build its house?
    Igloos it together.
  8. Why did the music teacher go to jail?
    Because she got caught with too many notes.
  9. Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
    Because she’ll let it go.
  10. What did the ocean say to the shore?
    Nothing, it just waved.
  11. What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
    A carrot.
  12. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
    Because he was outstanding in his field.
  13. What did one hat say to the other?
    You stay here, I’ll go on ahead.
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Laughing cartoon dad with the joke: Looks like we’ve got a screen play, reacting to a broken TV, surrounded by happy emoji faces on a purple background.
  1. Why don’t crabs donate?
    Because they’re shellfish.
  2. How does the moon cut its hair?
    Eclipse it.
  3. Why did the belt get arrested?
    For holding up a pair of pants.
  4. Why can’t you trust atoms?
    Because they make up everything.
  5. What do you call a cold dog?
    A chili dog.
  6. Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
    Because it felt crummy.
  7. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
    Nacho cheese.
  8. Why did dad put his money in the blender?
    He wanted to make some liquid assets.
  9. Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
    They’d crack each other up.
  10. What did the dad buffalo say to his son?
    Bison.
  11. Why was the calendar so popular?
    Because it had a lot of dates.
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Cartoon dad next to the joke: You stay here, I’ll go on ahead, with floating emojis and a vibrant orange background.
  1. How do you organize a space party?
    You planet.
  2. Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long?
    Because then it would be a foot.
  3. What kind of music do mummies listen to?
    Wrap music.
  4. Why did the grape stop in the middle of the road?
    Because it ran out of juice.
  5. Why did the chicken sit in the middle of the road?
    It wanted to lay it on the line.
  6. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
    A gummy bear.
  7. Why don’t you ever see elephants hiding in trees?
    Because they’re really good at it.
  8. What did the dad say after eating a clock?
    That was time-consuming.
  9. Why can’t you play cards in the jungle?
    Because there are too many cheetahs.
  10. Why don’t pirates shower before walking the plank?
    Because they’ll just wash up on shore.
  11. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
    An abdominal snowman.
  12. Why did the computer catch a cold?
    It had too many windows open.
  13. Why did dad bring a ladder to the bar?
    Because he heard the drinks were on the house.
  14. Why did the lightbulb go to school?
    To get a little brighter.

💬 Bonus Funny Dad Jokes You Didn’t Ask For… But We’ll Answer Anyway!

1. When does a dad joke officially become a dad joke?
When it becomes apparent.

2. What did the dad say when his coffee spilled?
“I guess it was grounds for divorce.”

3. Why do dads never tell secrets in a cornfield?
Because the corn has ears.

4. How do you know if a joke is a dad joke?
It leaves you groaning… and slightly impressed.

5. What happens when a dad sings in the shower?
He becomes a soap-er star.

For more on why these groan-worthy gems are loved, check out this Wikipedia article on Dad Jokes.

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